Friday, 12 January 2018

HOW IT ALL STARTED

Bonjour, 

Let me start my first blog of 2018 in wishing you Bonne Année and Bonne Santé.    

It's at this time of year that I'm reminded of when I became seriously ill in 2003. I had no idea what was happening to me and was very worried. I had started to realise that something was not quite right when in 2002 I had what seemed like bouts of flu. I would take time off work and rested. Then I would start to feel a little better and would try to go back to work. This pattern repeated several times throughout the year. I'd never had flu before in my life and couldn't understand why I suddenly had the flu that Summer. My doctor was not much help and suggested that I have the flu jab in September. I think that only made me worse. So by the end of the year I completely collapsed and was unable to go back to work in the January of 2003. In fact I never went back and remained severely ill. I despaired of my doctor who was clueless and so changed my doctor. I was eventually sent for lots of tests and of course nothing showed up. However with my history and symptoms I was told that I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ( I was also told that the name had recently changed from Myalgic Encephalomyelitis). It was not the flu!!! 

The cause of M.E./CFS is not clear and there are many theories. Although the dominant theory seems to be that it's caused by a virus.

Some people seem to become ill suddenly overnight and can in fact recall the very date when that happened. They may even celebrate their 'sickaversary' - a term coined to celebrate one's anniversary of becoming sick.  

Others like myself seem to become gradually ill over a period of time. I cannot forget the years 2002 and 2003 when slowly everything changed. The activities and the life I loved bit by bit disappeared. In place I became a sick person with a multitude of symptoms. 

I'm still that person today. 

However I won't be celebrating. The champagne is on ice until the day when the definite cause of this dreadful, life destroying illness is discovered and a cure is found. 

I hope it's in my lifetime. 

A bientot 
from the French Femme
xxx


How it started

It started
like the flu
that never
went away.
I wanted
 to sleep not
just at night
but by day.

Yet I still
felt tired
despite of
all that sleep.
Energy
was all gone
and I felt
very weak.

My throat was
very sore
and my glands
seemed to swell.
There was pain
in my legs
and I felt
so unwell. 

A fog came
in my head.
Everything
spun around.
It became
hard to think
and words could
not be found.

Yet since then
I’ve suffered
more symptoms
that are new.
I think that
it was more
than the worst
case of flu!

It started
like the flu
that never
 went away.
I still have
most symptoms
and suffer
to this day.



     

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