To sleep or not to sleep!

Bonjour,

In the last week I`ve once again been suffering from insomnia or those horrible nightmares and dreams.

I feel like my bed is a battlefield. I can`t recall the last time I had a good night`s sleep!

So what`s going on?

Well sleep dysfunction is a common problem for people with ME which includes

• Insomnia
• Difficulty in initiating sleep
• Frequent awakenings
• Nightmares or agitated dreams
• Non-restorative sleep
• Variations in sleepiness and energy throughout the day
• Sometimes hypersonic (excessive sleeping)

In the early stages of the illness hypersomnia is more the problem, when you need to sleep a lot longer than `normal` yet don`t feel refreshed. This may also happen in a relapse. Some find a reversal of their sleeping pattern and find themselves sleeping more in the day than the night. And then insomnia seems to become the pattern later in the illness. 

 It seems that the most common sleep dysfunction in M.E. is light sleep, where you never hit the deep stages of sleep (Stage 3 & 4) required for restorative sleep. This is because the endocrine system (which produces hormones) is dysfunctional in people with M.E. In a healthy person, the body naturally produces more dopamine and serotonin in the evening, as it gets darker. These two hormones are released in the brain, causing the normal progression of all of the stages of sleep, including deep sleep. Without enough of these hormones, the brain stays in the light stages of sleep.

So no wonder I always feel tired!

I have written a few poems about the problems of sleep in M.E. and I was approached by Julia Cottam to use these poems for The Big Sleep for ME during M.E. awareness week in May 2013 

She along with M.E. Awareness: Words and Pictures provided the artwork for the poems

I think the combination works well and helps to bring the poems alive.

Here are some examples.

This poem entitled Sleep highlights the problems around initiating sleep, frequent awakenings and insomnia.

 



The second poem ME Sleep patterns is about the changes that take place in sleep patterns from hypersomnia to insomnia, sleep reversal and unrefreshing sleep.

The third poem Nightmares and dreams is about the vivid and strange dreams that I and many others with M.E. suffer from. 

Sometimes I have one dream that goes on all night. I can wake up, go back to sleep and continue the same dream. It seems impossible to escape the dream. It`s like I`m living a different life in a parallel universe (I watch too much Star Trek!).

Sometimes I have one dream, wake up, go back to sleep and then have a different dream. It feels that my sleep is a never ending succession of short stories  - all as real and vivid as the next one.

Sometimes I can`t tell the difference from my dream and reality.

Sometimes the dreams turn into nightmares and I`m scared to go back to sleep.

These dreams and nightmares are exhausting.    

Here's another poem about Dreams

Sometimes we can become Paralysed in our sleep 

It's certain that we spend a lot of time in bed! 

With that I think I'll go to bed and hope not to dream! 

Bonne nuit 
From the French Femme xxx  

 

 

 

 



 

 



Why write poetry about M.E.?

Bonjour, 

I know poetry is not everyone`s cup of tea but I have found it to be a good way to express how I and others feel about living with this dreadful illness. I hope that I am a voice for others who find it difficult to express how they feel. 

I believe that it`s a simple but effective method to say directly and succinctly what it`s like to live with M.E. and that it`s a simple and easy way to help others to understand this illness. 

My poems are a window on a life with M.E., how it affects and changes lives, the suffering with so many symptoms, the lack of understanding, the emotions and experiences that so many have in common.

Many people find it difficult to explain what it`s like to live with M.E. 
Usually it`s only others who suffer the same who can understand and empathise.
Through my poems I want to increase the level of understanding and to help others to feel less alone with this illness. 

I have been writing poems for many years and it`s only more recently that I  have started to focus more on M.E. Writing poems has helped me to cope with this very difficult illness. I have found it has helped me to write it down and put into words how I feel. At times it has been a painful and emotional process - especially when I`ve read back the poems to myself. I guess seeing it in black and white hits home and the reality of my life since becoming ill.

Maybe you will have the same reaction when you read my poems. Maybe you will have gone through the same experiences, felt the same emotions and faced the same problems. Maybe you will feel a sense of relief, that you are not going crazy and above all that they are not alone. If that is the case then all my efforts will have been worth while. 

If you have been diagnosed with M.E., or even another invisible illness, I hope you will be able to identify with my poems. I want you to know that you are not alone.

If you don`t have M.E. I hope that my poems help you to understand this difficult and complex illness.

I hope that it will help you to gain some small insight to what it`s like to live with M.E.

This is the first poem I wrote about ME and formed the basis of my book of poems about M.E.

 

The book is called `My A-Z of M.E.` (Myalgic Encephalomyelitis) written by me, Ros Lemarchand. It's available on Amazon in many countries throughout the world in paperback and kindle editions. 

Here is the link to my Author's Page on Amazon UK 

A percentage of sales always go to Invest in M.E. Research. 

This book was the first of many to follow....

 

Au revoir!

From the French femme

xxx