Friday, 12 January 2018



Let me start my first blog of 2018 in wishing you Bonne Année and Bonne Santé.    

It's at this time of year that I'm reminded of when I became seriously ill in 2003. I had no idea what was happening to me and was very worried. I had started to realise that something was not quite right when in 2002 I had what seemed like bouts of flu. I would take time off work and rested. Then I would start to feel a little better and would try to go back to work. This pattern repeated several times throughout the year. I'd never had flu before in my life and couldn't understand why I suddenly had the flu that Summer. My doctor was not much help and suggested that I have the flu jab in September. I think that only made me worse. So by the end of the year I completely collapsed and was unable to go back to work in the January of 2003. In fact I never went back and remained severely ill. I despaired of my doctor who was clueless and so changed my doctor. I was eventually sent for lots of tests and of course nothing showed up. However with my history and symptoms I was told that I had Chronic Fatigue Syndrome ( I was also told that the name had recently changed from Myalgic Encephalomyelitis). It was not the flu!!! 

The cause of M.E./CFS is not clear and there are many theories. Although the dominant theory seems to be that it's caused by a virus.

Some people seem to become ill suddenly overnight and can in fact recall the very date when that happened. They may even celebrate their 'sickaversary' - a term coined to celebrate one's anniversary of becoming sick.  

Others like myself seem to become gradually ill over a period of time. I cannot forget the years 2002 and 2003 when slowly everything changed. The activities and the life I loved bit by bit disappeared. In place I became a sick person with a multitude of symptoms. 

I'm still that person today. 

However I won't be celebrating. The champagne is on ice until the day when the definite cause of this dreadful, life destroying illness is discovered and a cure is found. 

I hope it's in my lifetime. 

A bientot 
from the French Femme

How it started

It started
like the flu
that never
went away.
I wanted
 to sleep not
just at night
but by day.

Yet I still
felt tired
despite of
all that sleep.
was all gone
and I felt
very weak.

My throat was
very sore
and my glands
seemed to swell.
There was pain
in my legs
and I felt
so unwell. 

A fog came
in my head.
spun around.
It became
hard to think
and words could
not be found.

Yet since then
I’ve suffered
more symptoms
that are new.
I think that
it was more
than the worst
case of flu!

It started
like the flu
that never
 went away.
I still have
most symptoms
and suffer
to this day.


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